What I found when I was online dating that even though a person indicated that they were ready to meet people, they were not always ready like they thought they were. They sabotaged the chance of getting to know me somehow or another when I knew they were interested. This happened a lot actually.
I know that they may not of been into me and that is ok. This in itself helps you get closer to knowing who it is you are looking for. You want someone that is into you and is generally interested in getting to know you because it is way more fun.
If it is not fun then, next!!!
I know that I most certainly did my own share of sabotaging. Some of which I was aware of, usually after processing it, and some of which I was not.
For example It took me a while to get it, but when I did boy did it zing me hard. There was this very attractive man on line that approached me, saying something like, "Now you look like you have it together (or are normal)". I can not remember which he said exactly?
Anyways, he told me at the beginning that he did not let his girls whom were young, know that he dated. Even though he was no longer with their mother for 3 yrs. Which I respect. No one knows what is best for your family better than you.
My kids had accepted the fact at this point that Mom and Dad were no longer together and had the time to do their own healthy processing around, Mom is dating now.
My daughter came downstairs and saw that I was on line and curiously sat down with me. She saw this man and his girls in a picture and they are a very beautiful family. I asked my daughter so what do you think of him?
She and I generally do not have the same taste, but she thought he was cute and said," Mom tell him that I say hi to his girls".
So I did just that, and later realized when he never called or wrote me back again, that in the innocence of a moment with my daughter, it must of looked like I was not respecting his choices and probably looking very needy, neither of which was attractive or the case.
It took me a couple weeks of realizing he wasn't going to call like he said he was and that is when I realized, "Oh, ok, bummer. I can't take it back or explain it, I'd look too needy." Oops!
Miscommunication online seemed to me very common. There is no inflection in your writing or tone and guys and gals do not think alike for the most part. You can only do your best to explain, learn from your mistakes and move on smarter than before.
You will automatically, even when online dating, attract the perfect person in to your world that will mirror back exactly where you need to become more aware in that moment giving you a lot of valuable insight.
With the proper tools you can step into your own authentic power like never before. If you are willing, you can become a better person for it by reaching for your highest potential as you keep aligning with your truth.
I know everything works out perfectly and I learned a valuable lesson to try on the others perspective first when ever you can and always pause before you press send.
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